I posted a couple of months ago on The Last Psychiatrist’s post on suicide, which is still being hotly debated, and to be honest, is rather depressing. I gather that the majority of people commenting on the post have a general agreement that life has no purpose and as one commenter said, "just *is*." If there are people who think differently, I wish they’d leave comments. It appears that most people seem to think that life is rather wasteful.
A commenter named Jack posted his controversial thoughts. His entire post echoes what I’ve thought in the past (and currently struggle with) and what I’m sure others who attempted or committed suicide have thought too.
As someone who has been suicidal for much of the past two years, all I can say is "fuck off, doc. You don’t know shit."
First of all, what is so precious about human life? There are 6+ billion of us on a planet that really should max out at 2 billion of us, if that. There may be a few hundred that are actually irreplacable, true prodigies who really do make the world better in some unique way. The rest might be good for a few laughs now and then; but really, death is going on all the time and people manage to move with family and friends dying off throughout their lives. Almost no one will make a contribution that is unique or essential or won’t be provided by another nearby human.
So if life seems to be dedicated to kicking you in the crotch over and over again, if you can’t climb out of your personal hell, if every sliver of hope turns out to be another feint to get you to drop your guard to get wounded again, then who the hell is the rest of the human race to demand you continue to suffer? What could possibly be worth this? Am I really going to contribute more than I consume?
No, probably not at this point. The world has plainly indicated it does not value my contributions and capabilities. My friends aren’t going to feed and house me. They aren’t going to enable to do the things I consider important. I have a responsibility to not be a burden to those around me as well, to not drag down their lives with my considerable failings. My insurance policy is worth dozens of times what the world actually seems to value me for each year, would that money be more worthwhile to improving the lives of those close to me than a few more laughs?
I mean, sure, if I go out of my way to make my suicide clearly a statement of how much I hate my life it could make people feel bad and wonder if they couldn’t have done something. But what if I just put my car into an underpass wall at 90 mph? That’s not burdening anyone with the guilt of my death, its just another car accident. Its damaging public property, but its just going to give some people some work cleaning up and repairing the damage.
So on the plus side:
1) I stop suffering
2) I stop bitching to other people about my suffering and bringing them down
3) Some people close to me get a bunch of cash
4) I am no longer a burden on a planet with too many fucking humans
On the negative side
1) Some people are sad for a little while, and then move on.
And even if some of them later commit suicide from the silly domino theory of suicide, do that really make a difference? There are still plenty of extra people out there.